We’ve been back in the house for a while now, and almost completely unpacked. We keep finding boxes of socks or books so I’m starting to think moving boxes have a Toy Story like quality to them and are coming to life when we’re not around.

Joel and I have felt so in limbo with all the house stuff. But that excuse is almost played out. We’ve got to get back to living our lives, but because it’s been April since anything was “normal”, I’ve forgotten how. I’m not a very spontaneous person and I like to pretend I’ve got it together by scheduling out my life.

But somehow I still never get everything done, and I’ve been thinking to myself, “I’m too busy!” I’m too busy to blog. I’m too busy to put away the laundry. I’m too busy to take a walk. I’m too busy reach out to a friend. I don’t know what the heck I’m busy doing. BUT I’M TOO BUSY.

I’ve read several blogs about saying no. I’ve seen the inspirational tweets about how you have permission from someone you’ve never met to give yourself a well deserved break. And these are the things I tell myself when I get home, take my pants off and marathon  Stranger Things  on Netflix..

But in reality the world moves on. And I don’t want it to leave me behind. I’ve got to stop saying no to things things that would be good for me, or good for someone else just because I’m “too busy”. I’ve got to get out of this mentality that I deserve time to be a blob with my BFFs Ben and Jerry. I’ve got to realize that I have just as much time in the day as everyone else. Shockingly, God gave Obama and I the same 24 hours in a day.

I need a perspective shift on the way I’m looking at my time, it’s a limited but equally distributed resource. Stress on the other hand isn’t a necessity, but is stealing my precious hours. I’ve got to say yes to getting stuff done, and no to stressing over it. I’m spending far too much time worrying about what people will think of what I do, and it’s stopping me from getting anything done.

Instead of turning the TV on when I get home and plopping down, I’m going to turn on a podcast and get chores done. Instead of mindlessly scrolling through Facebook, I’m going to actually call a friend and hear what’s going on with them besides the social media worthy stuff. Instead of grabbing that bag of chips, I’m going to take Dobs on a walk instead.

This doesn’t mean I’m not ever going to watch TV, get on social media, or eat chips again. It means that I’m shifting my focus to other things first. I’ve got to reset my defaults. I’ve decided that they worst part of the regular day job life is the monotony of the weeks. Large chunk of time go by without recognition, and that’s unacceptable. “Seize the day” and all, but more importantly I’m a happier person when I have something to show for my time, instead of sadly spending my day staring at my phone.

I’ve let job changes, house crises, and weight gain control how I react to the world, and I’ve just been along for the ride. No more. Resetting my focus, resetting my defaults, resetting, probably most importantly, my attitude.

Focus is the difference between falling and falling with style.